Living Through Art
When I finally Believed
Like A Fiend That Finally Sees When The Dope Is Gone
Will To Live
I consider this painting to be a very vivid portrait of myself. It is an expression of all the anger, rage, hatred, love, beauty, and compassion that I am composed of; and so much more. Much more than I can adequately convey in words. This is my declaration to the mephitic forces in the world, both spiritual, and physical that I am not defeated. It is the resurrection of a life that was attacked and annihilated from the very beginning; a refusal to surrender and stop fighting; an emergence from the depths of despair; a violent attack on all that has tried to extinguish the beauty that for so long has been buried inside, scratching and clawing and waging war to be released and set free from the prison that this wicked world has tried to keep it locked up in.
This painting, to me, is an expression of the duality of the forces living inside of me. The fresh green light filled side and the dark, haunting, destructive side; both battling violently for control. Everyone of us deals with it and everyone has the choice of which he will yield himself to. We all have the ability inside of us to either ascend to celestial heights, or descend into the lowest recesses of the abyss. Villia miretur vulgus; mihi flavus Apollo pocula castalia plena ministret aqua. Let base wits admire vile things; as for me, let fair Apollo guide me to the muses springs. The idea came to me while my son was in a high level, therapeutic group home for heightened aggression tendencies and he asked me about painting a dark fairy.